Dan and I have a problem with saying no sometimes, him more than me if I'm honest. I feel bad inwardly but have less of a problem just declining things. Dan feels like saying no more than I do and doesn't feel bad about it, but he is prone to over explaining his reasons which can make things more complicated than it needs to be - often people will try to find solutions for his reason for saying no or whatever.
This week we've not done our usual thing of trying to soften the blow and always be the nice guy (I'm not actually a nice guy at all), we've said how we feel and let things unfold as they will.
I upset two of my friends this week by being a bit more vegan than usual, they said that eating a sausage was hardly the end of the world (we were talking about dieting), so I dropped in "other than for the pig", I was clearly being flippant, but it didn't go down well!
Secondly we had to deal with a couple of frenemies. One is a former colleague of Dan's, who is a nice enough person, but very overbearing. They asked if we wanted to go out for a meal at a posh (their word) restaurant near us next February. Dan just said no, we don't eat at fancy places, it's not our scene and we don't really want to commit that far in advance. They replied suggesting maybe we could meet for drinks afterwards, that sounds fine, and it was left that we could arrange something nearer the time. Perfect.
Thirdly, we were supposed to be meeting a person we know this weekend. Initially it was to celebrate their birthday and Dan felt bad that hardly anyone turned up for their actual celebration. So the person suggested coming here and we would have a wander to see the illuminations, which was fine. I'm not bothered about this person either way, I find them to be a little rude and a bit of a know it all, they're a friend of a friend of Dan's, but the friend has fallen by the wayside over the years, it happens.
It became clear that they didn't really want to come here, so we said we'd meet in Manchester, which then revealed their actual wishes and they started to add other people (that we don't know) to the meet up, that's fine with me, dilutes the input of this person. Then they started to manage our travel, food and other arrangements, this was the final straw for me and I was furious (it doesn't take much with me). I was going to cancel anyway as I was totally in the wrong frame of mind, but as luck would have it yet something else has gone wrong with the car so we can't go anyway. It remains to be seen how this will go down, and to be quite honest I don't care, I don't need someone who makes me feel so cross in my life.
So, we've had a week of saying no and nothing bad has happened, a lesson we'll hopefully take forward, and now I have time to make waffles this weekend.